1. |
I Missed Out
03:39
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I should listen to what you're saying but my monologue’s on
I don’t feel anything at the moment I’m hovering numb
Never took anyone home on a Friday night
No one in person but that's alright
Watch some Bildungsroman and I‘m
F#m Cbm E A
Just seeing a past and future that could have been mine
Can’t make up for the years I wasted online
A E Cbm A E Cm B
I know I was impossible
What I wanted was undesirable, and
We will be irreconcilable
I am responsible
F#m A E
Wasn't there
I was somewhere else instead
You can promise I’m still what you wanted
But I’m thinking five stages ahead
Family gatherings, I'd leave to check the phone
I'd come back after hearing awful things, I had to feel it alone
It's gradual then it's too late
For most people to relate
To how I felt there was something they didn't know
Wasn't there
I was somewhere else instead
I know you promise I’m still what you wanted
But I’m thinking five stages ahead
Never parked my car
Never dropped my phone
Never slept on the floor
I only thought about me
Never a rotten one
Never heard that song until recently
Because I missed out
I was motionless
I was hoping it would change
Never sharp enough to speak
I typed in a screen
Never had what
Everyone else writes about
I missed out
Try to make up for the lost time
I have a lot to answer for
Try to make up for the lost time
If it's worth leaving what I was before
Found comfort in the catatonic state
I think that's okay
If I made it through
But it gets harder to never face
With their hands were all over
Their hands were all over it doesn't matter to me
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2. |
WAINY (Buster Keaton)
03:14
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I just want to watch what you're doing
I just want to imitate the movies
I can’t climb in
I’m not Buster Keaton
No guard so I forget
How often I project
I swear I’ve grown
I catch a glimpse and I’m thrown
Cause I spend all my time recovering
From the sight of what I should be
And I spend all my time wondering
What I gotta do
to be more like
I’ve found people like me
I refuse to believe I’m bound to by more than circumstance
I love them but I promise I’ll leave them when I get a chance
I just need to get out of my eternal internal monologue
Get out of my mind
Because you're on it all the time
But I spend all my time recovering
From the sight of what I should be
And I spend all my time wondering
What I gotta do
to be more like
You kill me
you leave me a spirit without a body
You are my phantom skin
I do not
Want to control you I couldn’t take you over
Be everything you’ve been
So much for building my own self
this is not love, it’s just hell
I spend all my time recovering
From the sight of what I should be
And I spend all my time wondering
What I gotta do
To be more like you
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3. |
Control
03:49
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I heard from someone you can’t both love and control
That wasn't you but I thought it was possible
Different stories will be told
As long as nothing breaks your hold
T-t-t-tears in your eyes, hand on my shoulder, deny what you’ve heard
Hand on your heart cause you're so lost for words
as your hand slides down my back
I try to slide right past
As your hand slides down my back
I learn to deal with that
As your hand slides down my back
I learn to deal with that
It doesn't always hurt but it's still control
It's petty things that add up, always uncomfortable
I know stopping them is a lot to ask
If I ever leave and there's a reason to come back
I swear
I'll come
Always told to speak up until you do
In the abstract, there’s nothing wrong with you
But the structures I may upset
Are not ready to come apart yet
that may
never come
I know what you will say if it's ever expressed
I know it’s not really control it’s just a way to protect
And I project
I’m sorry for everything I said but
You can’t make it leave
You can’t take it from me
I spend too long talking about my feelings
So tell me how your day was and that’s our evening
Maybe a song I can throw on
So nothing will go wrong?
As your hand slides down my back
Say nothing until after the fact
As your hand slides down my back
I’ll learn to deal with that
It’s understandable, you’re paranoid paranoid paranoid
Afraid of losing control like I’m Icarus when I’m walking out that front door
It’s understandable. you’re paranoid paranoid paranoid
Afraid of losing control
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Fell From The Tree Rochester, New York
I fell from a tree.
I am in a fog and I catastrophize.
I am not ENOUGH, but that's ok.
Now I find Answers in Between
theanswersinbetween.bandcamp.com
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